Churchy tales

I've touched on this before, but I'm at it again...
When Parker prays, we never know what we are going to get.

At the very least, big smiles are a given.

Or if you are me and apparently lack self control, you are trying your hardest to not fall over laughing and are quickly trying to wipe away your laugh tears upon the "Amen" before P-Man notices.
I know.
Such a bad example and completely irreverent but I really do try. Really.
& for the record, he doesn't know I am laughing at him.
It takes all my might, but I am discreet.

Often times he and Emmie fight over who is saying it, which results in a simultaneous outloud prayer offered by the two.
I am torn when this practice arises, because when trying to reinforce the correct way, the result is often much screaming by Emmie. & let's be honest.
That's not setting the best tone for the prayer.
Okay and I might be a bit lazy. But even moreso hungry. I just want to eat dinner without a ten minute delay due to technical difficulties & get these kids bathed & off to bed so that I can have five minutes to myself for the first time in the day. 
I like honesty.
So sometimes simultaneous prayers are just what we do at our house.
 Double the prayer = double the blessings, right?
That's what I try and tell myself anyways. :)

The thing is, Parker's prayers are so heartfelt and genuine.

 He's not trying to be funny or come up with peculiar things to pray about. They are straight from his heart and that intricate brain of his &

that's what makes them so good.

Here is an example of a small portion of his prayer the other night - not even one of his very funny ones but one that I quickly wrote down when he was finished...

Heavenly Father,

We're grateful for good moms and dads.

Grateful for good brothers and sisters.

Grateful for good cats and dogs.

Grateful we could eat our dinner fast so we could get treats.

Grateful that we don't play with matches.

Grateful that we don't die from bugs.

Grateful we didn't get kidnapped.

Grateful that we can play the Wii, but not on Sundays.

In the name of Jesus Christ,

Amen.

Grateful that we don't die from bugs or play with matches??

Where he comes up with some of this stuff, don't ask me.  

But I'm grateful that he is grateful. Especially about the matches.

What a guy.

& while I'm at it, here are few more classic church tales as of late to add to the history book of Parker H.....

P-Man has a hard time sitting still.

Okay so that might be a complete understatement.

He has a really, really, really hard time sitting still.

Like last Sunday night at a family party at my Dad's, Kylie and Steven challenged him to see how long he could sit still. He sat there, unmoving for several minutes.

Several minutes.

That is by far his record.

I was amazed.

And proud.

But I digress.

At church last Sunday, he was his usual wiggle-bug self pacing in front of me as we tried to listen to the speakers. I asked him to please sit and be reverent and he responded,

 "But Mo-om. I just have so much ENERGY in the day."

This answer struck me as funny.

Because I'm a witness to that truth firsthand.

How could I argue with that?

PB please....

Parker refuses to eat bread.

Except for peanut butter and honey sandwiches.

This doesn't work out so well for when the sacrament tray of bread comes around.

He's never taken it.

He's 4 1/2.

Today as it came around he asked, "Mom, do you think that we can let that Deacon know to let the other Deacons know that I only like my bread with peanut butter so that the next time they'll send mine with peanut butter?"

Hmmm. Never heard of that but maybe for kicks I will put in the request.

I wonder if it would it be inappropriate if I whipped out a jar of Jiffy during Sacrament meeting....?

When I try to explain to him that we take the sacrament to help us remember Jesus, he replies in a bored, "duh"-like tone,

"But Mo-om, I don't NEED to take the sacrament to remember Jesus.

I remember him everyday! I'm a smart kid, remember?"

& once again, how do I argue with that?