Families are Forever

The Hansen clan just 9 months ago.

Adorable Atticus sitting proudly on Grandpa's lap...

 

8 months later in TX...

It's crazy how life can change in the blink of an eye.

Isn't that the truth. 

I received this lesson a few years back when my brother died.

It was brutal. I couldn't breathe. I was devastated. And shocked. For a long, long, time.

It still hurts. It always will.

I retook this dreaded lesson on another level most recently with the loss of our sweet nephew Atticus. The premature loss of a loved one is definitely not a course anyone anticipates or expects that they will be forced into.

 It's an agonizing one.

 An absolute life changing one.

 A nightmare.

 When we heard of Atti's diagnosis this last January, we were floored.

SHOCKED and incredibly heartbroken do not begin to sum it up.

I'd never seen Chris so upset before in my life.

But then, it's not everyday that your nephew is diagnosed with terminal brain cancer.

We were pretty depressed and had a hard time functioning. We just couldn't begin to believe that this was happening. Our hearts just ached for what we knew was coming. What we saw happening. I braced myself knowing the horror that I went through in losing my brother would soon be Eric and Cindy's reality but unimaginably even worse, in losing their SON.

 The thought truly left me in panic attacks. 

We felt so helpless.

 And were.

Especially by the fact that this was all taking place in Texas, while we sat in Utah.

Over the last 5 months, amidst the heartbreak and devastation there were miracles that were witnessed. Beautiful moments and memories were made. Quality time was given and some amazing things happened.

We were so thankful for the opportunity to go back to visit Atti in Texas about a month ago. We cherished our time with our sweet nephew.

 {I have many pictures to post from that trip but it's just too much to revisit right now.}

 We got back from Texas on a Monday, and received the dreaded news that Atti passed away the following Sunday, the day before Memorial Day.

With broken hearts, we packed up and headed back to Texas for the funeral.

 I took a few pictures at the graveside service, but out of respect for Cindy and Eric I don't think I'll share but just these few and several things I want to remember from that day...

Atticus had been declared an honorary deputy sheriff a few weeks prior. The department had a uniform made for him and everything. It was absolutely adorable. They had a big ceremony for him which made the local news.
Clearly, the entire police force fell in love with him that day.
So rather than Atti's casket being transported in a traditional hearse, (sp?) he went in a police Tahoe, and the entire funeral procession had a police escort to the cemetery! That whole line of cars in the left picture is part of the procession - and that was just a small part of it! They had all the intersections police-barricaded for us. Bystanders were coming out and staring, wondering what in the world was going on.
And it wasn't just a short drive from the church to the cemetery.
 It was AMAZING.
 I'm sure Atticus thought it was the coolest thing.

Atticus' adorable little brother, Isaac, aka Chunk.
 I truly feel that the veil is thin for these little ones and I am certain he knows his big brother is watching over him. I love this picture of he and Emmie, with his hand on the band just above "Atticus".

As the graveside service came to an end, I was super touched when these darling little friends of Atti's and Isaac's suddenly encircled Isaac. In the reverent manner in which they did this I could feel of their love for Chunk and for his brother, and had a strong impression of Atticus being there and loving and appreciating these precious friendships. It just seemed a symbol that Isaac was going to be well taken care of and watched out for. These cute little girl's mom has been a tremendous blessing to Eric and Cindy throughout this journey. We've been so grateful for all the amazing Texas friends and ward members who have taken such good care of them throughout all of this.

The "Angels for Atticus" wristbands were blue and orange, so in celebration of Atticus that day much of the family and friends attending wore those colors.

 If you can call a funeral beautiful, it was. Every last detail that was planned out was amazing. Very touching. Cindy shared the most amazing poem. It can be read HERE. And Eric gave the most heartfelt, beautiful talk I have EVER heard. You can read it HERE. Take a kleenex. He spoke directly to Atticus and WOW was it incredible. Truly!
 I was so proud of both of them. Talk about a hard thing to speak at your child's funeral.
 But they did it and they did it beautifully and with grace.

 It was the most heart wrenching thing I have ever witnessed to stand by helpless as Cindy and Eric grieved over their sweet son.
Our hearts just ache for them.
I am so grateful for the knowledge that we will se Atticus again. I know that we will. I am so grateful  for his life and all that we have learned from his amazing little spirit.  We have been tremendously blessed by him and all that he has taught us.
We love you Buddy!

An Angel in the Outfield

Our precious little nephew Atticus returned to his Heavenly home this last Sunday after his valiant fight with brain cancer. This last four and a half months since his diagnosis have been agonizing for our family, I have to say. What a brave little warrior he is and we are honored and humbled to have this incredible spirit as a part of our family. He is truly an amazing force and has taught the world to walk in His light. We love him so much and it hurts to think how much we are going to miss him. So so SO much. We are so grateful to know that someday we will meet again and that meanwhile this incredible little boy is free to run and play and hit all those home runs he was known for just six months ago.

To read his incredibly touching obituary, go here: www.echansen.blogspot.com



We were SO  blessed to be able to go to Texas and visit Atticus just 10 days ago.
 How grateful we are to have spent that time with him!
I haven't had time to document our trip yet, and plan to, but meanwhile here are a few pictures...
(of the bizillions you know I took;)

My Father-in-law put on a Pinewood Derby! Atti looooves cars and so a Pinewood Derby race was so much for him!

Atti, Isaac & Lexi

Atticus was so cute with Lex. Very gentle with her!

..& Isaac (aka Chunk) is the sweetest baby in all the land. No joke!

 LOVE these two boys! And this girl!

They have this absolute dream place called "Bahama Bucks" in Texas that has the most heavenly sno cones...I've been craving another one since we went....It was DEEElicious!

The three amigos "racing" down the back alley.
Atti and Parker are about 18 months apart (just like their daddies), and Emmie and Atti just 8 months (Atticus is older). I've always thought these three look like they could be siblings.

Atti was always cracking jokes and always tried to have on a happy face during our visit, even though he didn't feel well. I just love him so much. There is such a sweet tenderness about this precious little boy that is impossible to convey in words. His sweet, smooth little voice is music to my ears and his maturity weeeellll beyond a four year old's. This little boy had (I prefer to say has, as I know his little spirit is near) more wisdom in his Being than most adults accumulate in a lifetime of many years. Even being so sick, he just radiated such a light.
 Of course he did.
Look at all the lives he's touched!
He was surely sent here with a divine mission.
  Saying goodbye the night before our plane left was one of the most excrutiating things I've ever done.
We knew it would be our last moment here on earth with him.
 Talk about heartwrenching.
He is one SPECIAL little boy!
{That description seems so inadequate.}
 I am so grateful to  Eric and Cindy  for allowing us to go out and spend that quality time with their precious son. I am beyond grateful that myself and Chris, and our kids will have those special memories and these pictures to treasure in the years to come.  

Building garages with blocks to house all his hundreds of race cars!

Hard to believe this was just last Christmas. We had no idea he was sick. Just 3 weeks later his diagnosis would come...

And this is just last September. He was so full of life. I'm so glad I took these pictures. SO glad. The picture on the right is how I picture him in Heaven now.
 Excited. Happy. Free!
We love you, sweet Atticus! I get so (so so so SOOOO) sad to think that my kids don't get to grow up with their amazing cousin, but then I am comforted to think of the angel in the outfield we have watching over them and what a glorious reunion we have to look forward to!
xoxo

Mother's Day

I am so blessed to have these amazing kiddos in my life. I love being their mom & am so grateful for the joy they bring to Chris and I.

On Mother's Day I woke up to some beautiful flowers (I failed to take a picture of them) and some awesome notes from my kids. I love it when they draw me pictures, and even more I love the smile they have on their faces when they present me with their masterpieces.

 It makes my heart happy!!!

While Chris was at a church meeting, Parker made me the following while I was getting ready, without any help!:

It says: "Mom I love yow and I  wal nevr stop luve n yow. Mom I love yow."
(Translation: "Mom I love you and I will never stop loving you".)
How PRECIOUS is that?! Not bad for a preschooler spelling things all by himself, ay?
And if you wonder what the picture is, he wasn't sure! He later decided the pink guy was an elephant with a pack on his back. I can see that! :)

Parker helped Emmie with hers (above). So cute!

And this was a special gift he made for me at preschool. He came home so excited, hiding it behind his back and told me he was going to hide this special surprise in his room until Mother's Day.
 And that he did.
The flower petals are made with his fingerprints.
 I absolutely LOVE it!

After church, we were sitting on the couch and my tricky husband had his "helpers" start presenting me with the following pictures they made:

This one says, "You are the cutest mom ever", and was presented with a Visa gift card to go shopping! Oh, how I loooove guilt-free shopping!
 (I bought myself some tangerine skinny jeans - in case you wondered;). Super practical, right?)

This one says, "Use this to get a treat", and was presented with a
 Roxberry Smoothie gift card!
I'm a little addicted to their "Green" smoothies. Have you had one?!
LOVE! LOVE LOVE!

This one says, "This will help you relax", and was accompanied with a gift card for a spa pedicure! (I haven't had a chance to redeem this one yet and it shows.)
My husband definitely knows me!
Better than I know myself sometimes!
 I am one lucky mama, and wife.
We just stayed home this Mother's Day as Chris' Mom was in Texas with our sweet nephew, and my Mom was living it up in Hawaii. It was perfect, relaxed, laid back day at home! Chris cooked dinner, and I even got a much-needed nap. It's been a crazy couple of months, so this was the perfect way to spend our day.

Lexi is 7 months

This little girl is 7 months old today!


She had her 6 month appointment
(yes, a month late even though it was scheduled 2 months ago) on Monday and it's hard to believe that this Chunka Love is only in the 14.03 %ile for weight, and 6.96%ile for height!

Oooh don't you just want to squish those little cheeks?!
You should see her thighs...they. are. the best!
{Live it up girlfriend, sad to say but thunder thighs don't stay in style forever. ;)}

She's not quite sitting up yet by herself.
We're working on it!
She's super wobbly but Chris and the kids timed her the other day and she stayed up for 6 minutes.
She spins herself around on her tummy as well as continues with her rolling to get where she wants. She has zero interest in cruising or standing yet. Hopefully it stays that way for a while longer!

She is the BEST baby and I adore every squishy little inch of her!

Easter anyone?

I guess it's about time I post about Easter!
I wish I could tell about how our holiday was calm and serene and focused on all things it should be, but in keeping it real, and like usual, our holiday was a fiasco.  Good, but trust me, a fiasco. No matter how hard I try to be on top of things, that just seems to be my life these days. And that is an understatement. ;) We are considering a move across the country to see if that will ease up on the chaos in our life. ;) I'm kidding. Maybe.

Showing off their new shades...

I was hoping to have the Saturday night Easter Bunny visit, but with Chris working until 7 pm, that was not an option. So Sunday morning the games began and the kids were very excited that the white fluffy guy had come. Funny, his handwriting looks a lot like Chris'...

Lexi's first Easter!
 I wish I had gotten a better picture of her, or one at all of just her in her Easter dress, but the following is all I managed before our mad dash out the door...:

Easter 2012

I did manage to catch a shot of this cute girl before her hair and dress were ruined (there is about a 5 minute window there...). But as for the other two, it didn't happen. Oh well. She actually had the beginnings of a nasty cold and Lexi was just starting her very first sickness (we spent the following 5 days home sick), so the three of us stayed home while the boys went to Sacrament meeting...

Then we were off to my cute Grandma's house, where it felt a little more like Christmas than Easter. There were multiple Easter baskets for each of my kids,treats that will last us to inifinity and beyond, and we even hit the jackpot with Easter eggs containing $10 for each adult...spoiled!

Next stop was the Hansens, where we enjoyed an Easter dinner and of course an egg hunt for the kiddos.

I was so exhausted this day that I honestly can't recall another detail!
 Good thing I have these pictures to help me remember.

St George

The week before Easter (March 29th-April 4th), we hit the road and drove down to St. George to see my Mom and Reed and in hopes of some good quality family time with our kiddos!
With NO mountains of laundry and endless messes calling my name!
Ok, so that place doesn't really exist with 3 kids but this was the next best thing!;)

 Steven and Kylie decided to come down last minute too  (and their new puppy, Winston), so it was a full house! It was fun to have them there. We did a lot of things that I decided not to haul my camera to and swimming was one of them. This of course topped the kiddos list of desired activities. They are WaTeR-CrAzEd little people! Good thing we start lessons again in June so that I can maybe stop having anxiety attacks every time we get near a pool because my fearless 3 year old goes sprinting to jump in, completely confident she can actually swim (um, she can't.)!
Deciding that Lexi was too little to expose to the germ-infested waters (and realizing we had no baby swim diapers), I let Chris handle the crazy two in the water while Lexi and I laid in the sun (okay so she was shaded) and read The Hunger Games (FINALLY and I LOVED it!).
Ahhhh. So nice. :)
 We also went to the park, miniature golfing, to  Jumpin' Jacks, and ate at Brick Oven (yum). We  cooked smores one night in the fire pit (pics above) and I've never really been a believer of aliens, but was a little bit convinced one night as Chris and I hot tubbed and were mesmerized by this bright light hovering in the sky (not a plane, not a planet... trust me, UFO was the only logical explanation) above us. It was actually a little creepy, I'm not gonna lie. ;)
{I mean, hello, it was the perfect scenario for the aliens to abduct us....}

Back on planet earth....
I don't know what this place is called but it's downtown and my kids always like to play in the fountains. We also went on a Carasoul ride there.

Our "hike" in Snow Canyon.
This was our first time there and we will definitely go back!
 It was so pretty and just a short drive.
 Those are supposedly some pioneer names carved into the mountain by the actual pioneers. Hmmm... They were a little too perfect if you ask me for 150 year old carvings...
(I know, I know...believer of the aliens but not the pioneers... go figure! Haha;)

On Sunday between conference sessions, the kids got to go on a fun Easter egg hunt in the front yard.
They were of course beyond thrilled for this activity brought to them by Uncle Steven and Grandma Jane.
(are those the cutest eggs that link together like that?!) 

I managed to snatch a few cute pics of this little cutie.

And THIS sweet little one didn't make ONE PEEP our entire 5 hour drive down and back (except to laugh hysterically at Parker for about 15 minutes). She was perfect the entire trip! What an angel! I think she almost has Chris convinced that we could have one more (haha almost)...
Fun times. :)

Good to know!

Parker and Emmie were playing out back yesterday as I was trying to get a few things done in my kitchen. I am usually pretty strict about wearing sunscreen, but was busy and just didn't think about it, especially since it was a pretty cool day (I even had Emmie in a coat).

 I felt awful last night as I noticed how their little faces had gotten burned by the sun!

Then today I happened upon this post (as I was looking for a recipe) about a girl who is a melanoma cancer surviver. She went to the doctor after noticing a small mole turn a different color (I have one on my arm that's been calling my name for months now...) and sure enough it was malignant melanoma and they operated the next day! She went through this twice and was super lucky to have caught it early on!
Some facts that she shared...

 Did you know that children who get sunburned before the age of 18 are twice as likely to get  skin cancer? And that if you don't catch it early, your chances of survival past 5 years are only 10%?!? 10!

I just thought this was such a good reminder of how important it is to wear that sunscreen all.the.time! I have had a nagging feeling to get to the dermatologist for about 6 months now to have a few things checked out... I think I'm going to finally make that appointment. I had no idea how serious it really can be! Chris is a red head and absolutely refuses to wear sunscreen - he just bakes in the sun! Aghh!

CLICK HERE to read the article. If you haven't already visited the Six Sisters' Stuff blog, I highly recommend! Great recipes, crafts and insights!

It's a short post and I highly suggest reading it before you go forgetting to lather up on your spring outtings.

Half a year!

Lexi turned 6 months old on April 4th.

How has time gone by that quickly!?
I just want to freeze her.

She has been such a sweet baby and such a joy to our family!

She started rolling from one place to the next a few weeks back and it has become her favorite mode of transportation. She especially enjoys her new hobby while wearing comfy clothes and a crazy hairdo.

She hasn't started to say any real words yet, but does say "uh-muh" sometimes when she's crying, so I like to think she's trying to say "mama". :) Parker translates it as so and big brother's know best, so we are going with that.
 Her favorite babble lately is to say "buh buh buh" over and over.

She had her first taste of rice cereal last week! She loved it! Well, sort of. She loved putting the spoon in her mouth anyways. :) We're going to start some fruits and vegetables this week. Exciting!
{We hold off on baby foods around here for as long as possible. I don't want to chance any food allergies by starting too soon. Life without peanut butter would be a real drag.  Plus it's what my pediatrician recommends and nursing is just easier, cheaper, and not so messy.}

Lexi looooves her baths and this was her first one in an actual bath tub a few weeks ago while we were in St. George! I must be crazy but I've been giving her baths in my bathroom sink and that pink little tub that you get from the hospital when you have a baby. I haven't wanted to risk exposing her to any of the kids germs in their bath tub (and until I force myself to clorox all their bath toys - they really gross me out), and my tub seems like it's too big and would be a waste of water. So, I've been squeezing her into my sink! So far it's worked fine but we've got to graduate to the real deal soon - she's getting too big!

Red is good

Parker's first love was for strawberries.

He demanded them in the womb.

Literally.

They were my #1 craving while that handsome first-born child of mine swam around in my uterus.

 I ate hoards of them during his 9 month stay in my belly (via my beloved "Sprouts" store in Surprise, AZ!).

In hindsight it's no wonder he didn't want to come out.

 He had his own built-in strawberry IV!

  & from the first moment he tried them as a toddler, it was as though he was reunited with that first love.

 He was smitten.

 Five and a half years later,  he and his strawberry love affair are still strong as ever.

 He will eat a whole flat of them in one sitting if I let him, at any time of the day.

 I have decided that his infatuation with them may be why his favorite color since he could say so has always been RED.

Well, there is lots of love in his little heart (& tummy) for that color...

This last year P has developed an almost equally-obsessed love for another red produce that I have mentioned before...

Tomatoes!

Personally, I refused to touch the red vegetable until I was 21.

{Now I'm hooked.}

 But this 5 year old will pop grape tomatoes like candy.

 (& trust me, this kid knows how to eat candy!)

As for me, I prefer to eat them after 12 p.m., but not him.  He begs for them beginning at 7 a.m. with his breakfast, post his ritualistic waffle with powdered sugar (& strawberries of course).

My little mommy heart smiles (& kind of giggles) as his precious hands and high-pitched voice simultaneously start quivering in anticipation as he asks,

 "Mom, can you get me some tomatoes with my waffle, please?"

*SIGH.*

I love this sweet little guy. How can I turn him down?

Especially when the request is such a healthy one?

Well, I can't.

And I don't.

Needless to say, we're excited for the upcoming months of eating these goods straight from our garden.

 FOR FREE!

We're so looking forward to summer around here!